Monday, August 25, 2008

Dear MIA,

I'm sorry that you've been having a hard time. When you said "I couldn't even muster up the energy to call you," I knew you must be really depressed. I mean, I'm your closest friend, right? Right?

Did you know that during the last two weeks, I had to make a decision about whether or not to have something killed? Something that I loved dearly? Did you know that AJ and I have been going through some rough spots and that I really needed a friend? Did you know that I've been feeling entirely alone in this town and that I've been questioning the quality of the friendships I've made?

No, you didn't. Because you didn't bother to call me. Not even once. Even after I bumped into you in the grocery store and told you that I was having a hard time.

I understand depression. I've been through it. And I'm talking "clinical" depression...not just feeling blue. So, I understand that you're probably feeling hopeless and like everything's pointless...and that it's hard to motivate yourself to do anything. I get it...I really do.

But here's the thing: I need reliable friends. And while I love you, I'm a human being and I can't give give give and not receive. I just don't work that way. So, I can understand that you might not be able to call because you're going through a hard time, but you need to understand that I don't want friends who aren't there for me when I'm having a hard time.



1 comment:

Ms. Moon said...

I find that the older I get, the less friends I have. But the ones I DO have are completely awesome and precious and they are always there for me and I try to always be there for them.
As with everything, we grow and evolve, and the nature of the friendships we have do too.
Concentrate on the good, real ones.